Stay at home to fight the epidemic and learn to "come to the National Day"

Hao Xuguang Li Baiyu

(Source: "China Bank and Insurance News" 2020-02-27)

Editor’s note:

People often have negative emotions when they are forced to stay at home due to the epidemic. In the face of negative emotions, it is recommended to adopt the "three no's" principle and the "eleven come" method to deal with it. Going further, there is a need for “change of perspective, transfer, substitution and sublimation”.

In the face of the sudden epidemic, cities and roads are closed, communities are quarantined, and people communicate with each other one meter away from each other. As the epidemic changes and time goes by, the emotions permeating the hearts of people at home gradually change from tension, anxiety and panic to boredom, depression, depression and other negative emotions. These are all normal psychological reactions. However, if these negative emotions last too long or are too severe, they may increase unnecessary psychological burden, manifesting as insomnia (also drowsiness), irritability, irritability, etc., which will affect people's mental health and even physical health. Therefore, during the epidemic, while staying at home, you should try to effectively regulate and manage your negative emotions.

Accept and understand negative emotions

In work and life, you must first accept and understand your own negative emotions. This is the prerequisite. Negative emotions usually come from unsatisfied needs and so on. The epidemic broke out and the normal order of life was disrupted. It is completely understandable to have negative emotions at this time. Even in ordinary times, ordinary people will have some negative emotions, let alone during this special difficult period? Negative emotions are like guests at home, they will leave once they come. So accept it, this is a normal phenomenon in life and a problem that must be faced. Once negative emotions arise, face them calmly and accept them.

Facing your own negative emotions, you need to change your ideas and work hard to adjust your mentality. You can't be like an "ostrich" who dares or refuses to admit that you have negative emotions. Many people cannot get out of negative emotions. The main reason is that they cannot accept that they have negative emotions. In the past, emotions were considered irrational and even destructive. In society and families, emotions would interfere with life and work, and individuals were not allowed to express their loss, fear, anger, etc. at will. "I am so rational, how can I have negative emotions and be affected by them? How can negative emotions find me?" and so on. Denial is not the solution, acceptance is the starting point. Only by accepting the fact that you have "negative emotions" now can you face it. Once negative emotions are accepted and understood psychologically, people may not be easily disturbed by negative emotions. Acceptance is not escaping, it is acknowledging reality and actively looking for solutions.

“Three No’s” principle

No blame. Do not blame the thing or person that caused your negative emotions, and do not blame your family or peers with strong emotional tendencies. Blaming the people and things around you at work and in life cannot achieve the purpose of resolving your own negative emotions, and the more you blame, the less conducive to the relationship between you. Blame is nothing more than a way to vent, nothing more.

Don’t compromise. The manifestation of compromise is to ignore one's own feelings in order to temporarily compromise with negative emotions, often self-sacrifice, lower one's expectations, and rarely emphasize constructive goals and actions. The result is that the original negative feelings remain and often self-doubt.

No escape. Typical methods of escape are wishful thinking in the hope that negative emotions will disappear automatically; letting things go, treating them negatively, shelving negative emotional issues; silence, procrastination, and not taking action. Sometimes I numb myself by drinking, sleeping, playing games, indulging in surfing the Internet and browsing various information on various social media, eating more snacks, etc. The result of escaping is that you feel even more guilty and the original negative emotions still exist.

"National Day" method

1. Find out. Find the source of negative emotions. During the epidemic, boredom comes from the sudden disruption of life routines and having nothing to do. The irritability comes from being enclosed in a small space for a long time, and if it is not handled well, it can lead to "intensive phobia". The depression lies in the inconvenience of life and the inability to do the things you want to do. For example, you must wear a mask to go out, it is inconvenient to go out easily, you cannot have gatherings, etc. Humans are social animals and have the need for social interaction. Nervousness, anxiety and even fear come from the unknown about the epidemic and its contagiousness. The unknown is the main reason for fear. Fear also comes from being bored and surfing the Internet without restraint on various social media. The common focus of these media is the epidemic. The more you read, the more annoying you become and the more scared you become. The more annoying and fearful you become, the more annoying you become, forming a vicious cycle. Once you know the source, you can target it.

2. Say it. Solving negative emotions is like treating water. It should be channeled rather than blocked. You can communicate with your loved ones, relatives and friends instead of colleagues. This communication partner may not be as good as yourself in other aspects, but at least he is worse than you on the issue of causing a certain negative emotion, and the personality of this communication partner must be cheerful and not too showy.

But active communicators should have a certain degree of self-restraint, and should not regard the other party as a "trash can" for venting their emotions. The basic requirement is not to harm the other party.

3. Sing. Sing seriously in your room. Scientific research has shown that singing is a good fitness method. During singing, your breath needs to be adjusted and your mood will relax. It is rare to see people who sing depressed or angry.

4. Put it down. It means putting down your mobile phone (including other network devices, the same below) and staying away from social media for a while. People all have safety needs, including the desire for a safe physical and emotional environment. For example, the need for personal safety, occupational safety, life stability, and psychological safety. During the epidemic, people need to take the initiative to stay at home. Boredom and boredom are the norm, and some sensory deprivation will occur to some extent. At this time, people often become quite sensitive, and safety needs have a great impact on people. At this time, it is normal to look at your phone more frequently and for a longer time than usual. Mobile phone information has obvious fragmentation characteristics. People are in an atmosphere of information explosion. Because the transmission speed is beyond imagination, information is readily available, the cost of receiving information is too low, and the cost of forwarding is almost negligible. This also encourages people to constantly look for new information and forward new information. You spend too much time looking at your mobile phone. You are exposed to a huge amount of information every day, but you feel that there is not enough information. The more you know, the more you want to know. It is a bit like a stimulant. The more you use it, the more addictive it becomes. The more addictive you use it, the more you use it. Reading too much boring information aggravates people's insecurities. The more they read, the more they become afraid, and the more they become afraid, the more they spread, often forming a vicious cycle. Putting down your phone at this time is often a way to get rid of boredom, anxiety and even fear.

5. Write it out. People's negative emotions need to be vented, but to find a suitable outlet, writing is one of the outlets. This is not written on social media such as Weibo, WeChat Moments, etc. in order to spread the word. Instead, write it out for yourself as a record and as a way to relieve your boredom, tension, anxiety and fear.

6. Practice. Find a physical activity that you enjoy and that fits in a small space. From a physiological point of view, physical exercise is conducive to producing a pleasant substance, and from a psychological point of view, it is also conducive to people getting a pleasant experience during physical activities

7. Sounds like. Listening to some beautiful music, such as soft music, etc., can help you relax.

8. Read. Read some new classics and absorb more nutrients from them; or re-read classics and have a different experience than before. "Read" new blockbusters or classic blockbusters you didn't have time to watch before. 

Research from the Mind Laboratory of the University of Sussex in the UK shows that reading can reduce stress levels by 68%, listening to music by 61%, drinking tea or coffee by 54%, and walking by 42%. From this we can see the effectiveness of the above method.

9. Look. You can watch comedies and listen to cross talk, but watching a tragedy may be more effective in dealing with negative emotions. When people are so moved by the plot of the movie that they burst into tears, think about how much more miserable the protagonist is than they are! Could I be in a better mood at this time? The answer is yes.

10. Pick it up. Pick up things that you usually like to do but don’t have time to do. Some hobbies are too busy to take care of because of the pressure of work and life. Now that you have enough time, you can just pick up your hobbies. For example, playing with flowers and plants, playing chess (memorizing chess scores), practicing calligraphy, writing poetry, etc.

11. Get started. What to do? First of all, try to treat your professional work as a hobby, but also as a means of making a living. In one's own professional field, "dig a deep well", focus on positioning, dig deep into one's own major, use one's core strengths to dig deep, focus, concentrate, and persevere as much as possible, and strive to make achievements in one's major. This is the basis of professional security, an important reason for respect, and a requirement and performance for self-realization and a sense of accomplishment. A person who is obsessed with enhancing his core competitive advantage in his profession, improving his capabilities and increasing output will have a fulfilling life. Where can I find time to think wildly? How can I feel empty, bored, depressed, nervous and afraid? Staying at home during the epidemic is just a change of workplace. If you are a teacher, you should study hard, prepare lessons, observe, conduct research (online), and write papers; if you are a primary and secondary w88 casino student, you should study hard, lay a solid foundation, and broaden your knowledge; if you are a bachelor, master, or doctoral graduate, you should concentrate on writing your graduation thesis; If you are a working person, you should be serious about your skills; if you are a parent, you should patiently tutor your children in their homework and reshape the parent-child relationship with them; if you are a parent of a child taking the high w88 casino entrance examination or college entrance examination, you should be willing to do a good job in logistics services, etc., and strive to "sublimate" your job. This is the fundamental way to solve negative emotions.

Use a new perspective

Use a new perspective to truly solve the troubles of negative emotions. You can deal with negative emotions by changing perspectives, transferring, replacing, and sublimating.

1. Change the perspective. To use Epicurus' point of view to describe the meaning of changing perspective, "It's not the things themselves that make you unhappy, it's your view of things that makes you unhappy." A half-full bottle of water can be seen as a half-empty bottle, or a half-full bottle of water. By the same token, if the epidemic is serious and you have to stay at home and face difficulties you have never encountered before, whether you have wealth or negative equity depends on your perspective. This is a change of perspective. From a negative perspective, there are too many inconveniences and too many limitations. But changing the perspective, where do people normally have the opportunity to have such a long period of free time? Isn't this just an opportunity to make up for your academic and career shortcomings?

2. Transfer. It refers to shifting one's focus and place. For example, when staying at home, you shift from paying attention to too much fragmented information on the Internet to focusing on improving your professional abilities, etc.

3. Substitution. It is to replace the original things with new content, for example, "can't eat grapes", you can eat oranges or other fruits, etc. Use exercise, reading, and writing instead of browsing various social media, and use other media to replace media that cause negative emotions. For example, from "anxiety about not being able to go out to do things" to what are the conditions needed to go out to do things now? Do I have these conditions now? Should we prepare and supplement these conditions? From the "anxiety of not being able to find something suitable to do" to what course should I take this semester? What are the things you are most likely to need to do after w88 casino and work resume? Work on increasing the quantity and improving the quality of these things.

4. Sublimation. It is to use the so-called dilemma and regard it as a ladder of progress and development. Taking advantage of the dilemma of staying at home during the epidemic, I read classics that I had no time to read before, wrote articles and papers that I had accumulated a lot of information but had no time to complete, and prepared new courses that I had thought about for a long time but had no time to prepare. Focusing on hot topics during the epidemic and combining your own majors to conduct in-depth academic research will benefit the country and the people. According to their own majors, they should take advantage of the huge business opportunities provided by dealing with the epidemic. For example, some people have discovered the opportunity of remote online courses and actually developed online courses that are very popular and widely used.

The minimum requirement for "getting started" mentioned earlier is to do your job well, while sublimation is the highest requirement and the highest state of "getting started".

Of course, with these methods of dealing with negative emotions, do not mechanically understand the epidemic and mistake it for a good thing. The epidemic is by no means a good thing. We hope that we can effectively prevent the occurrence of epidemics and the adverse effects they bring in the future. But once faced with the trouble of the epidemic, as an individual who cannot go to the front line, he cannot indulge in the negative emotions caused by the epidemic and cannot extricate himself.

(Hao Xuguang is a professor at the Department of Human Resources and Organizational Behavior, w88 casino of Business, w88 casino; Li Baiyu is a national second-level psychological counselor)

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